Funny how since I started writing for Streetdirectory, I have ceased to update my blog as often as I used to do. Despite so many happenings, so many things in my life, so many things I want to comment about as I stroll along the streets - my brain seems to be maximising its short-term memory to the maximum. I forget half the things I thought about as I amble past my day, my incessant bitchin' has been lost to the wind and walls, my happiness remains as only a feeling of satisfaction within myself.
Then again, I haven't been feeling exactly satisfied lately. I'm getting unsure of my progress in wakeboarding and wonder if I'm merely embarking on another one of those "expensive temporary pursuits" in my life. I have taken 3 years to grow in floorball yet I know I am never gonna be that good. Perhaps the ego within is crying to be let out, to finally boast of something she is really really good at doing.
Like piano. But even now, it gets difficult to impress.
As 22 years of age approaches (rather quickly), jaded will best describe whatever I am feeling now. School is taking me away from all the stuff I want to do..it's taking up too much of my countdown to graduation. I have no wish to walk along with newly-made friends down my personal path of life - it has become an emotional drain. I lose myself in my food reviews, chatting with PR managers from various restaurants and hotels, in writing, in travelling on buses.
A darker side of myself has begun to surface after having ran away from it for so long. 2 relationships of "It wasn't really your fault; I'm just the one having problems" proved themselves true. As much as I want to lash out and say, its your bloody fault for not being able to adapt yourself to my life, you're too sticky you're too clingy, if you can't keep up just drop and go - of course, the root of them all simply lies in my cynicism, and the lack of love within me. Perhaps till this problem of mine is solved, I had best be left alone to my own devices, but ironically that will plunge me into a downward spiral of my own cynicism.
On a lighter note, I had the pleasure of reviewing Ricciotti, an Italian restaurant at China Square Central. They have really good looking staff - the chef at China Square's Ricciotti was funny and good-looking and he cooks greaaattttt stuff. This waiter at Riverwalk's Ricciotti (yes there are two branches) has got the most deep set Asian eyes ever, boy..do they only employ good looking people?
More Italian food coming up next week. I'm loving my job.
Then again, I haven't been feeling exactly satisfied lately. I'm getting unsure of my progress in wakeboarding and wonder if I'm merely embarking on another one of those "expensive temporary pursuits" in my life. I have taken 3 years to grow in floorball yet I know I am never gonna be that good. Perhaps the ego within is crying to be let out, to finally boast of something she is really really good at doing.
Like piano. But even now, it gets difficult to impress.
As 22 years of age approaches (rather quickly), jaded will best describe whatever I am feeling now. School is taking me away from all the stuff I want to do..it's taking up too much of my countdown to graduation. I have no wish to walk along with newly-made friends down my personal path of life - it has become an emotional drain. I lose myself in my food reviews, chatting with PR managers from various restaurants and hotels, in writing, in travelling on buses.
A darker side of myself has begun to surface after having ran away from it for so long. 2 relationships of "It wasn't really your fault; I'm just the one having problems" proved themselves true. As much as I want to lash out and say, its your bloody fault for not being able to adapt yourself to my life, you're too sticky you're too clingy, if you can't keep up just drop and go - of course, the root of them all simply lies in my cynicism, and the lack of love within me. Perhaps till this problem of mine is solved, I had best be left alone to my own devices, but ironically that will plunge me into a downward spiral of my own cynicism.
On a lighter note, I had the pleasure of reviewing Ricciotti, an Italian restaurant at China Square Central. They have really good looking staff - the chef at China Square's Ricciotti was funny and good-looking and he cooks greaaattttt stuff. This waiter at Riverwalk's Ricciotti (yes there are two branches) has got the most deep set Asian eyes ever, boy..do they only employ good looking people?
More Italian food coming up next week. I'm loving my job.