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Thursday, October 21, 2004

When I think I have time to blog, it turns out that I don't.

Like tonight. I finally completed what is expected of me till Wednesday, but now I'll have to prepare for 2 more essays before I settle down for the exam break.

Got very demoralised during Tuesday's floorball training...simply cannot shoot at all, can't seem to pass properly etc. Seems like I am not good in anything at all - I do everything wrong, I'm slow, I'm...oh well, there's nothing which I feel totally confident in anymore.

I've been going through this sinking feeling since school started, trying my darnest to get my confidence up, but till now I could not find anything to boost my morale. To the point where I feel I ought to slap myself awake and decide that I have enough of this, and that I must change my view of life from this second onwards. I got my floorball stick today, and I start worrying whether with this new stick will my playing change for the better.

I ought to stop putting unnecessary pressure on myself to excel, for I don't want the same thing to happen like what it did when I was bowling. I want to enjoy the game, but yet...how can I feel the exhiliration of it when I simply cannot execute a proper pass/shot consistently?

I must admit, I aim not for the best, but the better average - studies, work, sports. These 3 aspects keep me going but yet in my pursue of these 3 aspects, I have neglected the most important of all...my social life and relationships with my friends and loved ones.

I am still able to find my fun admist all these, for the above are just trivial thoughts which I have captured. :) Life is still good. Hectic, but good training.

x`p
1:32 AM

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| The Girl |
Twenty-two
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