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Wednesday, October 01, 2003

Past few days have been in a blur. Seeing different expressions on faces of people around me upon receiving back their scripts. Terrified looks caught in a micro-second as some hesitate to see their marks. Gasps, shock, disbelief, immediate swearing, sniffles (thankfully no crying yet :\ ) you name it, you have it.

After relatively good news, I am finally thrown back down hard on the ground. Its the GP results once again. This time, I am convinced that my English standard is just...there. You know, bottom? Rock bottom. June Common Tests weren't a fluke. Really. Oh well, I guess its high time I focus my effort to GP rather than my core subjects, which sounds rather wrong, but well, I have to.

So. Got back Maths, 2 out of 3 Lit papers (leaving the Gothic essays), Physical Geog. All I need are the 2 Gothic essays and Human Geog to make my grades complete. I am hoping a B, C, D. I can't hope for more.

I am so so happy for those who have done better than they have expected : Suzanne for GP (keep it up girl! *smiles*), Christina for Phy Geog. (see? kan jiong for what? Miss J refuse to look at you doesn't mean you are that bad what.). I am sure all for us can make it for the A levels, don't despair. Which also means I have to pick myself up again. Well! Last haul through, may as well do it good and without any regrets. We can't just lose hope and stop at Prelims. I hope this can at least get some over their initial depression and carry on "running" towards the finishing line. Painful, but we are all as a group. Nobody is alone in this.

Stupid school gates were closed even to the year 2s. And it has to be that damn OM again. Just has to exercise his authority over somebody else, so he pathetically chose the servants. Oh well. Out of the school by 12.30pm, headed down to City Hall to meet him and I guess, to walk around trying to lift my depression. Have this sudden urge to head over to Topshop to buy a sleeveless top, but I didn't have money. Drifted around Raffles City (literally) aimlessly, looking so listless. Headed back after an hour of walking. Still not feeling good.

At least orange milkshake made my day. The forever-red face, soft brownish hair that flops about coz he didn't gel it! Ooooh lala. For once, fish slice noodles in school actually taste good. *sheepish grin*

Attempted to play the piano, mastered a page of this really nice song by Chopin (yay)..it sounds so beautiful, really beautiful, if only I had a grand piano to play it. With the right touch, the music produced will sound heavenly, just heavenly. Played another 2 pieces from the Romantic period, all from Chopin. His pieces are simply too beautiful to be true, so is Brahms, Brahms for his dark and stormy pieces. Especially wonderful to express out on my piano because I can bang away with a depressed pedal so that the whole house will echo, vibrate with the music.

If only I can be lost in the world of music forever.


x`p
7:56 PM

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| The Girl |
Twenty-two
Aquarian
Just bummin' around
With too much on her mind,
and too limited words to say.



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